First it was vodka. Then it was the political party Nurotan. Then it was half the buildings and complexes in Astana, adding a Nur to their name. Now it’s table water.

I was surprised to see Nureke water in my local store the other day. Nureke is a diminutive form of names that begin with the syllable Nur. For example, Nursultan, the first name of the President of Kazakhstan. In case there’s any question of who they are referring to, the label also has a picture of Ak Orda, the President’s residence and a pair of hands holding a map of Kazakhstan. The hands echo in weird way the hand on the money, which is a rendering of the imprint of the President’s hand on the Monument to Independence in Almaty.

As a marketing strategy, it’s not a bad idea. The President is very popular, patriotism sells well around here and it may give the impression that this table water is better quality than other more common brands. But if I were the President, I’d be a bit insulted. 5 liter bottles of water are not elite bottled water. People buy them when their water is cut off, or if they need a lot of clean water to boil a huge hunk of meat or to make tea for 50 guests. It’s a pretty common, dare I say vulgar, product. If they named a luxury car or an elite living complex after me, I’d be happy. But water? What’s next? Nureke sewing needles? Washing powder? Shopping bags? If you want to honor the President, then honor him with something good.

And another marketing tip: personally I won’t be buying Nureke water again because it’s 5 tenge more expensive than other waters. With something as common as water, price is everything.

As for the trend to name things after the President, will it get to the point it has in Mongolia with the Chinghis Khan brands? Will Parliament have to step in and make a law limiting the use of the President’s name or derivatives thereof to protect his dignity?

Kazakhstan’s government is also considering raising $6 billion in funds to bail out domestic banks, should they be unable to pay back their loans. This is not completely new. Late last year, it came to the attention of the world that Kazakhstani banks had overextended themselves in borrowing money and the government was charged with cutting the budget to create a reserve fund. However that move was not covered extensively in the press.

This week Bolat Zhamishev, Minister of Finance, said that he has been consulting with foreign banks on how to create a bail out fund. The plan is to use $1 billion in government funds and $5 billion in private market funds, though how exactly that will work is unclear. The focus will also be on buying out “distressed” loans, ones that could potentially be repaid, and not on investing in “hopeless assets”. The logic presumably would be to free up bank assets to focus on the unrepayable loans, without risking taxpayer money? Can the US apply a similar strategy, if that works?

It’s official Lance Armstrong did announce that he will be joining Team Astana. He will not be taking a salary or any bonuses so Team Astana got a good deal. Most people agree that Armstrong chose the Kazakhstan team because of his former coach, Johan Bruyneel. And the presence of Alberto Contador, the 2007 Tour de France champion and last week’s Spanish Vuelta winner.

There are already tensions: Contador is leader of the team and according to the Kazakh Cycling Federation, Armstrong and Contador will share leadership next year and Contador is suggesting he might leave if that happens:

“I think I’ve earned the right to be the leader of a team without having to fight for my place,” the Spanish rider said Tuesday in AS newspaper. “And with Armstrong some difficult situations could arise in which the team would put him first and that would hurt me…My intention is to stay (at Astana) because I have a contract until 2010, but I have already received a good number of offers from other teams,” he said.

From AP News

I wonder if Armstrong is upset that he ended up getting scooped by the Deputy President of the Kazakh Cycling Federation, Nikolai Proskurin, who made the announcement earlier? Probably not. That likely had more to do with timezones.

The question now is, why did Team Astana deny that Armstrong was coming? Did they not know? Did they not want to jinx the deal? Did they think someone would try to steal him away if they announced the deal?

I also don’t need to tell you that last night Khabar News ran a story, “Team Astana Gets Glory on the World Stage” about Contador’s win in the Spanish Vuelta and Armstrong’s announcement. While I always find it a bit pathetic that Kazakhstan seems to try to get an ego boost wherever it can, I would much rather hear about the glory of its cycling team than GDP growth. And let’s face it, you’re going to attract more tourists and more fans in the world with Lance Armstrong than with Grigory Marchenko. I would be willing to take on any bets that Google searches for Kazakhstan and Astana have been skyrocketing over the past few weeks.

So overall I think this is an awesome move. What do you think of all this?

After the buyout of AIG, giving the government an 80% share in this major insurance company, there has been a great deal of debate. There is outrage over the way the deal went down, without any warning and apparently without a coherent plan. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid expressed dismay, saying, “We are in new territory here…You could ask [Federal Reserve Chairman Ben] Bernanke, you could ask [Treasury Secretary Henry] Paulson. They don’t know what to do, but they are trying to come up with ideas.”

People are further worried that the buyouts will never end–as Representative Michelle Bachman said, “What’s next? Starbucks? Too big to fail?” Will the government end up having to bail out half the private sector if more and more companies fail? And of course there is worry that taxpayer money is being put at risk by investing in companies that have failed and may fail again.

Furthermore just yesterday Bernanke and Paulson appeared before Congress to announce their new plan for the government to buy private company assets, proposing a tender system. Questions of who will manage these purchases, who will manage the assets in the name of the government, what benefit the taxpayer may reap, how to price the assets, and how to avoid private companies benefiting unfairly from taxpayer dollars all came up in debate. It’s not a small matter because the Fed is proposing to put up $700 billion for buyouts and investments!

What is not being discussed in great detail here is that these bailouts are not just handouts or grants. When the US invested $85 billion in AIG, it became an 80% shareholder. That’s a controlling interest! And Congress has no idea what to do with the idea of government-owned companies or the government as a share-holder. What branch of the government should run these companies? Can the government make a profit on private businesses? What happens in January when a new President with a new Secretary of the Treasury steps in?

Kazakhstan and other former Soviet countries may hold the answer. Various Kazakhstani government leaders have said at various times that while Kazakhstan looks for advice from the West, the day will come when the West will come to Kazakhstan for help. That day has arrived. Perhaps the US should send some Congressmen to Kazakhstan to tour Samruk, Kazyna, and other state-owned financial entities here. Kazakhstan has had long experience with these models of state involvement in private companies. So why shouldn’t the US draw from that experience?

Furthermore, a lot of the complicated questions that the US is now facing while looking at Paulson and Bernanke’s plan are questions that have never been fully addressed in Kazakhstan. Because of its experience as a former Soviet country with a government controlled economy, issues like accountability or responsibility to the taxpayer have never come up. Old trends and mechanisms are rarely examined in detail. So this is a perfect opportunity for the US and Kazakhstan to work together to develop a model for government as shareholder in a globalized free-market system.

Some may think I’m being a bit glib here, and my tongue is not too far from my cheek. It is interesting to note the difference between Kazakhstan and the US. When the US buys out a company, taxpayers and financial advisers and politicians get nervous and even angry. Here in Kazakhstan, the government already controls 5 holding companies and many citizens don’t know these companies exist, or have a vague idea of what they do.

But I think there is a valid proposal here. How does Kazakhstan solve problems of using federal funds, taxpayer money for private enterprise? What regulations are on the books? How can Kazakhstan and the US work together to solve problems of conflict of interest, corruption and lack of regulation? Perhaps this is a perfect chance for Kazakhstan to be treated as an equal by the US and to be taken seriously as a source of knowledge in the West.

This article was originally posted by me at Atyrau Online. Since a surprising amount of my visitors here seem to be people 1) new to Kazakhstan and 2) planning to visit here for business, tourism, Peace Corps or adoption, I thought an article on manners in Kazakhstan might be useful. As usual I love comments telling me how right or wrong I am on this stuff–or interesting anecdotes.

It’s well worth it to learn a few words of Kazakh and/or Russian. Everyone likes to hear their native language. And Kazakhs are especially pleased when foreigners learn Kazakh, since it is the more obscure language. In Kazakh, salaamatsiz be? means “Hello/How are you?” Some people may say amanatsiz be? or “Are you well?”. The answer is jakhse or “Good”.

In Russian, zdrastvitye is “Hello” and Kak dela? is “How are you?”. Khorosho means “Good”.

If you are a man, shake hands with every other man you greet everyday. Kazakhstani shake hands when they see each other for the first time in the day or when they come to a meeting or party. They also shake hands ‘goodbye’ when they leave a meeting or leave work. They do not necessarily say anything while shaking hands, unlike in the US where it is common to say “Hi” or “How are you?”. In fact, some people may approach you silently and just stand there with their hands out-stretched waiting for a shake. The handshake is usually quick and not particularly firm.

Some women do shake hands with men although the majority do not; wait for the woman to make the first move and don’t insist if she doesn’t extend her hand. If you are a woman, decide if you want to shake hands or not, but don’t get upset if a man doesn’t feel comfortable. He may not say anything, simply refraining from taking your hand.

Also younger people or subordinates will initiate greetings with elders or their superiors. In other words, I say hello to my boss and my grandfather first, before they will acknowledge me. Talking of elderly people, some elders and more religious people may put their hand on their heart as they shake hands and/or take your hand in both of their hands. This is a traditional Muslim greeting. They probably won’t expect you to do the same, but it’s easy to mirror and it will please them if you copy it.

People usually do not say hello or shake hands with people they have already seen that day. If you do so, it may seem like you have forgotten them. Also, don’t shake hands across a doorway. Wait until you are fully inside to shake. Otherwise, it brings bad luck.

Finally, addressing people: Many Kazakhstani businessmen and politicians are familiar with Western-style addresses. In fact, they may assume Westerners are more casual than we actually are! They may be comfortable calling you by your first name and having you call them by their first name. Especially younger people will introduce themselves by first name only. If you prefer to be called by a title and your last name, introduce yourself that way. Older people in Kazakhstan and people in higher positions are typically called by their first name and their patronymic: Ivan Ivanovich. Calling them by a title will likely be acceptable if you can’t get their patronymic immediately. If you get a business card, the order of names will go: Last Name, First Name, Patronymic so you can cheat off of that.

I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned The Tin Cocoon here before. It’s a fun blog by an Afghan woman (Miss Talibonita) living in the US. Great commentary on pop culture both Central Asian and American and some awesome posts on how Central Asian culture is viewed by Americans.

I particularly wanted to share this image that she picked up from an Egyptian ad for Burger King. An outstanding mix of Islam and America in one image, a burger bit into the shape of the crescent moon. The text says “Ramadan Kareem” or “Happy Ramadan”.

Now that Team Astana has Alberto Contador, the Tour de France champion, Johan Bruyneel, the former coach of Discovery, and now Dirk Demol also of Discovery, it makes sense that rumours are flying that Lance Armstrong will join the team in 2009. However, all that Lance is saying is that he will return to cycling in order to raise money for an international campaign against cancer. In a video clip on the Lance Armstrong Foundation website he says that the rumors are true; he is returning to race in 2009 after consulting with his family and friends. But he makes no mention of teams saying only that on Sept. 24th he will make a more detailed announcement at the Clinton Global Institute. I’m sure that speech will be picked up by all the news outlets and we will know the truth.

If Armstrong is being silent on which team he will join, Team Astana has announced that they are not interested: “He is no part of our team,” (more…)